Need
Title: Need
General Information about Item:
- Verbal Folkore, Proverb
- Language: Chinese
- Country of Origin: China
- Informant: Yuriko Gonda
- Date Collected: 11-17-18
Informant Data:
Yuriko Gonda is an international student from Japan, studying at Dartmouth College for the year. She remains undecided on her major, but is considering pursuing law. She was born in Tokyo, Japan but moved to China for several years, then to England, then back to Tokyo. Her parents are Japanese, but her mother studied in China for several years as an exchange student in college. Her mother truly enjoyed living in China and absorbing Chinese culture, bringing back several Chinese texts, calligraphic art and paintings to decorate their home. Yuriko grew up listening to her mother tell Chinese stories, however she does not know the language herself, but has a desire to learn it.
Contextual Data:
Yuriko heard this proverb from her mother when her mother was discussing some of her college friends. One of her mother’s college friends had fallen on some financial hardship. Her mother and their friend group contributed some money to a fund to aid that particular compatriot. Her mother was discussing this situation to Yuriko and her father over dinner, and telling stories about her time in college with this group of friends. When Yuriko asked whether they were close enough to warrant that type of financial support, her mother reiterated the proverb that she had learned while studying abroad in China.
Item:
Orally transmitted proverb:
需要之时方知友 ’
Xūyào zhī shí fāngzhīyǒu
A friend is never known till a man has need.
Associated file (a video, audio, or image file):
Transcript:
A friend is never known till a man has need
Q: So what is proverb that you have?
A: 需要之时方知友 ’ (Xūyào zhī shí fāngzhīyǒu) (A friend is never known till a man has need. )
Q: Ok so can you tell me a little bit more about your background?
A: Ok so I’m an international student from Japan. I’m studying at Dartmouth for a year. I remain undecided on my major – but I’m considering pursuing law. So I was born in Tokyo, Japan but I moved to China for several years, then to England, then back to Tokyo. So my parents are Japanese, but my mom studied in China for several years as an exchange student in college. My mom enjoyed living in China and college, and she brought back several Chinese calligraphy. She really loved Chinese stories. I don’t really know the language myself, but I really wanna learn it.
Q: So how did you hear about this proverb?
A: So I heard this proverb from my mom. So she was telling my family about her best friend in China. So her friend went bankrupt in China, and she was telling us that she and her friend group helped her with financial aid and that time, she was told us the proverb and it meant a lot.
Q: So what does this proverb mean to you?
A: So I learned from this proverb that the friendship is a promise to make to each other no matter what the time or no matter where they are and what they are going through
Informant’s Comments:
Yuriko says this proverb is meaningful because she interprets it as saying that friendship is a covenant in many ways. To her, friendship is a promise that one implicitly makes to another to go through life together, and support each other no matter what the circumstances. She talks about how her mother’s actions illustrate this relationship perfectly. Even though her mother’s friend lives miles away in Shanghai, and they have not physically seen each other in over a decade, they are still connected by this bond. Yuriko discusses how powerful this idea of friendship is as a mutual agreement both parties enter into, bonding each other across time and space. You would normally hear this proverb when you are going through difficult times and need to depend on your friends for support.
Collector’s Comments:
This proverb has shaped Yuriko’s conception of friendship into a promise, in addition to merely being a relationship. Therefore, being a good friend is examining one’s character and their ability to have the integrity to follow through on all the obligations and responsibilities of being a friend. Her mother’s story highlights this idea perfectly in her actions to help out a friend even though they have not seen each other for years. It demonstrates how durable this relationship and covenant is.
Structurally, this proverb is different from the others as it is still segmented into two parts – but instead of a cause and effect, there is more of an interruption in that a person’s ignorance of their true friends will remain – until something happens to them that requires some assistance. The simplicity of the proverb stands out as well. It does not have the metaphors or imagery present in the other proverbs, but the simplicity magnifies the impact of the message.
Collector’s Name: Rachel Zhao
Tags/Keywords:
- Chinese
- Friends
- Need