Ribbon-Breaking during Bridal Shower

General Information about Item:

  • Customary Wedding Folklore & Material Folklore (the ribbons)
  • Language: English
  • Region of Origin: American (19th century onwards), familial heritage is French (perhaps carried over)
  • Informant: Joe Castelot
  • Date Collected: 5-21-2019

Informant Data:

  • Joe Castelot (aged 30) serves as the Deputy Director of the Collis Center for Student Involvement. In this role, he oversees the day to day operations of the Collis Center, Robinson Hall, Sarner Underground, and various other student activities and support facilities. He also is in charge of the Alcohol Management Program (AMP) and its staff. The collector (Michelle) works with the informant in the context of various Collis student activities. Joe and his wife Megan (formerly Bourbeau) Castelot were married roughly 5 years ago.

Contextual Data:

  • Cultural Context: The folklore tradition revolves around the number of ribbons that the bride breaks while unwrapping presents during her bridal shower. It is a tradition that is carried through Megan’s family, which was why it was included in the wedding traditions that the Castelots practiced. The essence of the tradition is a superstition, in the form of ‘If A then B’, as if the bride breaks however many ribbons, then that is the number of children the Castelots will have. Although, from the collector’s research, there are many tangential folkloric traditions associated with this custom. In some European cultures, it is considered bad luck to have scissors at the bridal shower as that represents a ‘severing’ of the marriage or in essence homeopathic magic (where cutting the ribbon signifies cutting the marriage apart). Likewise, breaking the ribbon is also used to symbolize breaking the relationship with the future spouse, which presents contradictory superstitions. When breaking the ribbon equates to the number of children, it may also serve as a reflection of more antiquated beliefs where a woman’s worth is tied to the number of children she bears. In the case of Megan’s family, there is more joy centered around when a knot can’t be undone and the ribbon has to be broken, as that represents the multitude of joyous occasions in the future.
  • Social Context: There were quite a few traditions that were observed during the ceremony (such as the first dance, first look, etcetera which can also be read about from the other folklores collected in this project). The Castelots likewise chose not to practice some traditions (from a pragmatic point of view): namely, the norm where the reception is for close family and friends while the religious ceremony is for all attendees (the Castelots chose to flip it around, so that the reception was more casual and for all wedding invitees) or the tradition of a ‘Dollar Dance’ where attendees may pay the bride or groom with nominal change for a dance. The selection of such traditions represents familial practices that the two wished to heed, in accordance with having a ceremony that would be understandable for all those who participated in the rites of passage but also allowed them to honor the traditions of their family’s ancestors and heritage.

Item (Direct Quote):

  • “There was a tradition from Megan’s side of the family, where those who attend the bridal shower make a point to tie very intricate and complicated knots in the ribbons wrapping the gifts, so that if there are any she can’t untie, she has to break. The number of broken ribbons symbolizes how many children we would have, which is a quirky tradition, but not necessarily how childbirth works” – Joe

Megan and Joe Castelot at their wedding ceremony (sourced from ctpost, a local newspaper announcing their marriage)

To read more about digital wedding traditions, refer to our write-up on Wedding Hashtags

Collector’s Name: Michelle Wang