Seeing the Bride on her Wedding Day

Title: Seeing the Bride on her Wedding Day

General Information about Item:

Informant Data:

Jamie Carpenter is a 53 year old woman living in Clearwater, FL. She is the daughter of a first generation Russian immigrant and and second generation Welsh immigrant. She is the middle child of 5, and she was raised in Florida. She grew up a practicing Christian and attended Catholic school. She is a homemaker and has three children.

Contextual Data:

Cultural Context: Avoiding seeing the bride before she walks down the aisle is a Western tradition, but it serves similar functions as veiling and pre-liminal rites of other cultures. This rite of passage would exist to allow the bride to exit the period of her life as a young woman, and enter into a sacred partnership. So it is important to note that while this superstition and practice may have had origins in what is considered the Western world, it does have international parallels.
Social Context: While nearly ubiquitous in American weddings, she learned of the tradition of the groomsman avoiding seeing the bride on the wedding day from her older sister Kim. She left her betrothed that morning and saw him again as she walked down the aisle. As this ritual is so widespread in America, it does not seem to be performed at specific times. There is subtle variations to how this customary lore is practiced. While this superstition is present to avoid bad luck, Jamie mentioned that she believed it also had a role earlier in society as a way in which arranged marriages could be successful, so that the groom would not be apprehensive.

Item (Direct Quote):

“I don’t remember specifically when I first heard this superstition, but I believe it was first witnessed by me at my older sister Kim’s wedding. She had a very official ceremony with many important rituals specific to her Catholicism. For me, I don’t believe I practiced many specific customs, however I assumed it would be odd to see Gary before walking down the aisle. That morning I said goodbye and left to go get ready, and the next time I saw him was walking down the aisle. This superstition may have arisen to protect arranged weddings, but I believe that today the purpose is less that or to avoid bad luck and more-so to prepare oneself for what is to come next. ”

Collector’s Name: Molly Carpenter

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Dartmouth Folklore Archive